Bacon's Blurbs: Quick Humor Headlines from Q. William Bacon
Wikileaks Reveals Photos of Justin Beiber's Naked Forehead
Photos reveal that Bieber's bangs have been hiding the face of Voldemort.
At Navajo Council Meeting, Kanye West Grabs Talking Stick
West then shouted that Beyonce should be the one chosen to receive the prized necklace of wolves' teeth.
Sell Your Junk Car -- they'll tow it, too.
Garrison Keillor to Write Erotic Novel
Mr. Keillor says, "My book will be like chicken soup for the penis."
Iranian Wildfowl Leader Denies Existence of Thanksgiving
President I'm-A-Dinner-Jad says, "It's just an excuse for American turkeys to appropriate the name of a great Islamic nation."
Race Car Driving Experiences Talk about a unique gift!
Obama Collides with a Large Hadron
President requires stitches after mishap during tour of CERN facility.
Bill Gates Wins Lucrative "Richest American" Award
Forbes Magazine's "Richest American" Award, once again goes to Microsoft founder William Gates III. As is tradition, he will be presented with a gold medal, a diploma, and a $100 million prize.
Donald Trump's Castleboat Capsizes Again
KEY WEST, Florida - "Anyone can own a houseboat," says billionaire Donald Trump. "I'm not just anyone. I own a castleboat. In fact, a replica of Bavaria's famed Neuschwanstein Castle, as a boat."
Dick Cheney to Join Bush on Book Tour
Former president George Bush will be personally signing copies of his memoir, "Decision Points". Former VP Dick Cheney will be personally crossing out the passages that threaten national security.
Every Object in Hollywood to Get Silicone Implants
Fearing a future of 3D movies and tv shows, every prop, costume, set, and background in Hollywood thinks it needs its surface depth surgically enhanced if it wants to keep working.